Rumors Confirmed! Sorta.

So today's big product announcement that melted blog servers all across the internet is Apple's new more absorbent maxipad, with improved channel design and a softer more comfortable top layer...

Whoops, wrong tab! Ctrl+W.

Hehe, sorry about that. I'd blame a browser malfunction but I use Firefox so nobody would believe me. Anyway, on to this morning's big announcement. Apple has (finally) released their tablet computing device, the iPad. And of course the pundits and analysts have been breaking their fingers typing out article after twitter post pointing out all of the device's shortcomings. Apple has been lambasted for everything from the lack of camera to the color of Jobs' turtleneck. Let's get into my take on this after the jump.

Confessions and Rumors

My previous post was obviously a blatant attempt at traffic-whoring by using a hot-button issue like the TSA mistreatment of a child to drive eyeballs to my blog. What sort of mistreatment? Well, pranks like this. That sort of search engine gaming is low-brow, crude, immature, and inappropriate. All of these factors will improve. I promise to get much better at pushing your buttons and hope to achieve a level of spittle-drenched skull-detonating full-moron wharrgarbl very soon.

OK, enough with the stupid confession booth bullshit and on to the unsubstantiated rumors.

The "next big thing" from Apple, which they are announcing later this week, will be the iSlab, which will come with the new iPhone 4.0 operating system and optional accessories available at Cupertino's normal extortionate price. The iSlab will obviously have accessory attachments available. Without attachments, this new product would be just a big iPhone, otherwise known as a "Yes, Grandma, like a Kindle." Regardless of what it will be called, what it will come with, what its price will be, or even if it will exist at all, the Apple fanbois will be lining up in droves to buy one, if they aren't already.
As a special treat (no sorry I'm all out of those brownies), I have secured an image of the prototype.

From Blogger Pictures

Michael Hicks

So this thread showed up on Fark about a Cub Scout (~8 years old) that shares a name with someone that's on the TSA watch list.
Do you know who else might be on the list? This guy from my alma mater; but he didn't start teaching there until after I graduated. Let's see... who else? All these people!
So the TSA says they're finally going to start tracking birth-dates along with names. I'm on the same "selectee list" Mr. Hicks is on. It'd be just my luck that the other [my name here] they're looking for is also 30 years old.

I'm here

So this is my blog. I really don't care what you think about my blog. This one's mine; you go make your own. I'll talk about whatever I feel like. Computer hacking, Scouting, World of Warcraft, irrelevant nonsense, anything I want. And you can't stop me!